Category: Lafftastic

What happens when you subject a fifth grade class to selections from Radiohead and then get them to draw their impressions? You get samples of artwork for their new album.
A funny post from the East Bay Express.
By way of Metafilter

Well, ho ho ho! It turns out that Lapdance Island was a sham by some Channel 4 “Candid Camera” knock-off. I got a letter that read in part:

The show promised to take ten hot blooded male contestants to a deserted tropical island and have forty lapdancers gyrate around them 24 hours a day.
The truth is there are no lapdancers. There is no island. There is no show.
We made it up to promote The Pilot Show, a genuine series starting on September 8 at 10.30pm on E4. The Pilot Show hilariously dupes unsuspecting celebrities and members of the public into appearing in bogus TV shows.
Sorry about the lapdancers but, as compensation, you can laugh as other people get taken for a ride on The Pilot Show by watching the special preview clips at http://www.channel4.com/pilotshow.

Oh, very witty, ha ha ha. I think that Channel 4 missed out on making some real gutsy TV here, as I would have loved to have seen grown men having nervous breakdowns while surrounded by equally unstable lapdancers in a Lord of the Thongs scenario.
And to think I sent in my answers to their poll:

No, no, no. Wrong, wrong, wrong. On the other hand, I have a feeling that many advance orders are being filled right now by legions of student filmmakers. I just hope Commander Bunnypants winds up taking his orders from an anatomically correct Ken doll.
Elite Force Aviator: George W. Bush

Another classic from Jack Chick. This one features two worrisome examples of “yoof culchur” learning to fear Jesus and the “Lake of Fire” that they’ll be tossed into if they don’t tow the biblical line. Apparently, where the artist is from, scary teens wear (stolen?) National Park Ranger hats. By the by, there is no link; this is from a Chick pamphlet given to my dad in a park. And the Jack T. Chick site seems to be down. Could it be….Satan?

No doubt many will say, “it took you long enough!”, but I just found my way onto the very hilarious (and long, long, long) site, Things My Girldriend and I Have Argued About, a scientific study of one poor English fellow being driven mad by his German girlfriend. Supposedly a novel-like adaptation is coming soon. This is the raw truth and it hurts in a funny way.
Found by way of Boing Boing

Ever got one of those spams supposedly from some poor resident of an African dictatorship promising you a 10% cut of millions of dollars if you help them squirrel some money out of the country? Sure, we all have. You ever wonder who these people are? An intrepid Scot and his buddies abroad set out to scam the scammers. This is absolutely brilliant stuff, and worth the long reading time. Thanks to my friend Chris for passing this on.

Today’s best chuckle, over at the McSweeney’s site: McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: My Beard, Reviewed.

Reuters | Wife-Subduing Air Raid Siren Confiscated
Mon April 21, 2003 08:35 AM ET
BERLIN (Reuters) – A 73-year-old man who used an air raid siren to stun his wife into submission has had it confiscated by German police.
“My wife never lets me get a word in edgeways,” the man identified as Vladimir R. told Mannheim police. “So I crank up the siren and let it rip for a few minutes. It works every time. Afterwards, it’s real quiet again.”
A police spokesman said neighbors had complained at the noise from the 220-volt rooftop device, believed to be an old-fashioned air raid siren.
Rosina, Vladimir’s wife of 32 years, said she sometimes had to yell to get his attention. “My husband is a stubborn mule so I have to get loud.”

Yes. (Sent in by Berry, my sister-in-law.)

Another great wacky Christian story!

Woman sues for religious harassment
April 16, 2003
WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. (AP) — A woman with bipolar disorder is suing her former boss for religious harassment, claiming he blamed her disorder on unconfessed sins and fired her because it was “God’s will.”
Michelle Subwick, 35, filed the lawsuit Tuesday in Palm Beach Circuit Court against Mark Kielar, president of WJMK Television Productions. She is asking for back pay, damages and attorney fees.
Kielar in a statement Wednesday denied the claims.
Subwick, who is a Christian, claims Kielar told her disorder resulted from Satan infiltrating her life. He advised her to pray daily with him, but she was fired when she stopped the sessions, the lawsuit claims.