Over 9,000 Penises

Apparently, Oprah, ready to believe anything she reads on TEH INTERNETZ, read this shocking bit o’ news the other day on her program:

… if you still don’t understand what our children are up against, let me read you something that was posted on our message board, from someone who claims to be a member of a known pedophile network, it said this, ‘he does not forgive, he does not forget, his group has over 9000 penises, and they’re all raping children.’

If her researchers had done any work beyond shooting coffee out of their nose after reading that Cthulu-style quote, they would have found it was some sort of 4-Chan/Dragonball-Z/Intertubes humor meme. The rest, they say, is an Internet Remix (see above). The spirit of Chris Morris lives on!

I phonebanked for Obama today…

This last week I spent waaaaaaay too much time reading the political blogs and getting depressed. So I decided to take that negative energy and put out some positive energy by volunteering for the Obama campaign. I came home today and wrote a diary for Daily Kos, which I am cross posting here:

Phonebankers need Kossacks’ help!
Sun Sep 14, 2008 at 05:10:15 PM PDT
Hi there,
Hopefully there’s room on Kos for another phonebanking/volunteering story today,
as I’d like to offer some suggestions and a call for help from everybody.
I’m trying to write this and not sound critical and nit-picking. And as this is my experience in one HQ in my city, I have no idea about organizational matters elsewhere.
So let’s start here: I assumed a few things about my local Obama office. I assumed that everybody is quite tech savvy. I assumed that because phone banking is a big part of GOTV, then the phone banking kit would be jammed full with facts and figures.
Ok, so I assumed wrong. There’s a script. There’s also a sheet on the issues, but it’s not easily digestible. Now, everybody in the office was very friendly and helpful, but I soon found I was lacking a lot of materials.
A few calls in I got a “leaning McCain” voter who saw Obama as someone who was going to raise his taxes. (“I’m what you’d call a rich guy,” he said.) I soooo wish I had that tax-plan breakdown graphic that was in the Washington Post, because this man may not have been “rich” according to the McCain plan. Nuts!
Another lady was interested in voting for Obama, but didn’t know how to register. I suddenly realized that I had no sheet on how to register to vote…I knew a few places (DMV, etc.), but I wanted a sheet with specific locations and such. As our Obama office is calling people in Nevada (Clark County), I realized I had no local info.
My favorite call today was to a 37 year old lady who had just come back from Iraq. She was so enthusiastic about Obama that she wanted to volunteer, but…she didn’t know her city too well. Where was the Obama HQ? Well, er, that was more info I didn’t have!!! Fortunately, she was a dear and held on while I raced upstairs and jumped on the net to find the addresses of the HQ. (And my complaint about the Obama site is that this info is hard to find. I went to Google maps instead.)
Of course, I shared this info with the people in charge at the office, and they were very ready to include these sheets in their phone banking packs. When I got the voter registration info (off the net, again), I made copies and gave them to all the other phone bankers.
But while driving home, I was wondering…is this the first time in the whole GOTV Nevada period that this has come up at my local office? Shouldn’t this be basic knowledge?
So, as I said, I’m not trying to be negative. My point is to all of us here at Daily Kos: if you know your stuff, if you have good info charts and visuals, if you have an idea about how to help the average phone banker–who may not be a natural speaker and/or debator, who does not have photographic memory–head down to your local Obama office and donate your intelligence!! DO NOT assume that they have everything they need. Often the staffing is very, very limited and they’ve got a lot more on their minds.
PHONE BANKING SUMMARY: 90% wrong numbers/out of service/answering machines. (We were told not to leave messages, because a later return call might get a person, which is better). I had a lot of people hang up on me (Dems, Reps, Independents alike!). No Dems were thinking about McCain, but about 1/3 of the registered Republicans were leaning or thinking of Obama. Issues? Taxes, education, change. (Does anyone have a good graphic explaining Obama’s education plan? Or one vs. McCain’s? Does McCain have an education plan anyway???)


Los Lobos, above, not being ripped off.
Did Paul Simon completely rip off Los Lobos for the last song on Graceland? Steve Berlin says yes and said so back in April 2006 in this interview for Jambase. The song in question is “All Around the World.” According to Berlin, they were called in by a WB exec to jam with Simon and they shared a song that was going to turn up on “By the Light of the Moon.”

I remember he played me the one he did by John Hart, and I know John Hart, the last song on the record. He goes, “Yeah, I did this in Louisiana with this zy decko guy.” And he kept saying it over and over. And I remember having to tell him, “Paul, it’s pronounced zydeco. It’s not zy decko, it’s zydeco.” I mean that’s how incredibly dilettante he was about this stuff. The guy was clueless.
It was ridiculous. I think David starts playing “The Myth of the Fingerprints,” or whatever he ended up calling it. That was one of our songs. That year, that was a song we started working on By Light of The Moon. So that was like an existing Lobos sketch of an idea that we had already started doing. I don’t think there were any recordings of it, but we had messed around with it. We knew we were gonna do it. It was gonna turn into a song. Paul goes, “Hey, what’s that?” We start playing what we have of it, and it is exactly what you hear on the record. So we’re like, “Oh, ok. We’ll share this song.”

They thought Simon was going to cover one of their songs…nope. Anyway, it’s a fascinating read and, damn, I hate when I read something shitty about an artist I like!
By way of WMFU’s Beware of the Blog.

Worst. Job Interview. Ever.

So Sarah “Failin'” Palin appeared in front of Charlie Gibson to answer some questions on ABC tonight. It’s painful. She had no idea what the Bush Doctrine is…I know what it is. My bleedin’ mom knows what it is! How can she not?
Look at that panic in her eyes for a second or two and then the bluff: “In what respect, Charlie?” She might as well have said, “Can you use it in a sentence?”
The whole set-up looks like a job interview, which, in a way, it is. And look at her body language in this clip…the lack of confidence, the secretive, hunched-over look.
And don’t get me started on the “war with Russia” crap. Christ, this woman is dangerous as well as ill-prepared. In her own words, “Thinks, but no thinks!”
P.S.: I was talking with my mom today and she said this: “There’s something about Sarah Palin that seems old fashioned and I couldn’t put my finger on it. But then last night I realized what it was: she has Priscilla Presley hair.” That’s my mom, providing biting commentary beyond that of the mainstream media.

A Heartbreaking Song full of Soccer Violence

Parry Gripp has been writing one-to-two-minute pop songs, two a week, since the beginning of the year, all available at his website. As he told me the other day, they’re really starting to find a groove. (Not that the early ones aren’t good, but a track like “Old Navy” rocks beyond its novelty lyrics.)
His latest is a sad song called “Soccer Ball (In the Face).” I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. So I did both.

Radiohead’s Santa Barbara Show now Online!

It was the hottest ticket in town, no joke, and I couldn’t go. And now people like the NPR’s Bob Bollen are calling the two-hour concert one of the best concerts they’ve ever seen.

Radiohead’s show at the Santa Barbara Bowl came as close for musicianship and creativity as any show I’ve seen in 37 years. I’ve seen a lot of shows.
These guys write great songs, and sometimes you can even sing along to them, but what they do better than any band is create a sonic adventure — a soundscape which, at its best, stretches time and allows the mind to wander and rejuvenate. I think of it as resetting the synapses. Creativity breeds creativity. When the music was over, I felt unboxed and changed and pretty darn happy. Drugs are overrated; music is underrated.

And, bless their cotton socks, NPR has posted the ENTIRE SHOW AS A DOWNLOAD! Awesome. The show runs at 133kpbs, which is pretty good.

John Hodgman has a new book coming out

Hodgman’s last book, Areas of My Expertise, was a laff-out loud, tears-rolling-down-my-face winner. His writing style is an American twist of Brit absurdity, very smart and learned, but also baffling and sometimes pointed. Most people know him as either the guy in the “PC vs. Mac” ads, or as a guest on the Daily Show. But his writing is in a totally different universe altogether.
His new book is called More Information Than You Need and is available Oct. 21, 2008. Yay!

Gyorgy Ligeti’s Artikulation

From the music blog Different Waters:

In the 70’s, Rainer Wehinger created a visual listening score to accompany Gyorgy Ligeti’s Artikulation. I (not me, someone) scanned the pages and synchronized them with the music.

Typically, scores like this are created by the composer as instructions to the players to improv. This is more a graphic after-the-fact deal. Still it’s cool and makes explicit the various sections of the electronic tape score. If you don’t know already, I groove on this kind of music from the 1950s and 1960s.
Why not buy some Ligeti?

God Ditches the GOP

A nice little opinion piece by Mark Morford in sfgate.com:

But here’s the saddest part of all: Governor Palin knew. She absolutely had to realize that her daughter’s unfortunate condition would come to light when McCain offered her this bizarre gig. To which we can only say: Way to shove your own daughter under the wheels of the GOP Machine, Governor Palin. Ultimate sacrifice indeed.
Ah, but perhaps it’s all a bit too much. Perhaps you think this perspective is just too negative, ugly, far too similar to how the right itself operates, full of low-vibration energy and fear and abhorrence of the Other, all topped by a cheerless belief in a cruel, micromanaging God who is so petty and small as to actually care about who you love, or how you vote, or what kind of sex you enjoy. Let me say this: I agree completely.

Yep, kinda sums them up.